What's the key to successful relationships? Here, Susan Quilliam reveals the simple things you need to know to deepen your partnership and make your relationship work

1. Without quality time, your relationship will not
survive. Carve out at least half an hour a night, and
at least one day a month when you the two of you
spend time exclusively together.
2. You will both need security, comfort. A good
relationship is built on compromise and a great
deal of give and take on both sides.
3. Keep your dependence and independence in
balance. Tell and show your partner how much you
need him, but don't cling, as that can make your
partner feel trapped.
4. Encourage him to listen to you, by showing
appreciation when he does. By the same token,
show interest when he talks to you. Be aware that
most men aren't mentally programmed for
conversation in the way women are. They need
more silence and internal time.
5. Make him appreciate you. Don't wait for a
spontaneous compliment, but say something good
about yourself and ask for his agreement.
6. Teach him, preferably early in your relationship,
exactly how to give you a fail-safe orgasm because
it's unlikely he'll find out alone. If you don't yet
know yourself, find out.
7. Learn to do the one thing that is most likely to
restore good feeling in your relationship - giving
your partner a genuine, loving and approving
smile.
8.Often those subtle quirks that first attracted you
to your partner can, with time, turn around and
become toe-curlingly annoying habits. Learn to love
him, warts and all.
9. Hidden resentments poison a relationship; so if
something bothers you, say it. Remember that while
men are wary of emotional conversations, they love
to find solutions. Express your problem and then
ask him to help you find the answer.
10. Learn that punishing your partner won't work.
It may make you feel better to give him a hard time,
but it will actually make him dig his heels in more.
A better tactic is to reward the things you like and
ignore what you don't like.